Headliner
Just when I think I am comfortable with a situation, things take a turn for the worse.
Background
A little background is in order. Amanda is my ex-girlfriend, and one of my closest friends currently. After me, she dated a guy named Brian for some time. They broke up several months ago. Brian has a brother named David (as do I).
Part one of the crap
I found out today from Amanda, that Brian is interested in Ashley. Not a big deal. Well, some cosmic force came over me and forced me to call Ashley and share this bit of information. I guess I was hoping that Ashley would sound very uninterested. Well, she didn’t. She didn’t exactly sound interested, either… but I was kind of going for something along the lines of “he doesn’t stand a chance”.
Part two of the crap
I spoke to Amanda later on, and told her that even though I am getting used to Ashley seeing other people aside from me, I don’t think I can deal with her seeing anyone in our circle of friends. I also told her that if Ashley and Brian do start anything, that I would more than likely back down. Well… Amanda talked to Brian later today, and what is the first thing she does: tells him that I said that. So now… Brian has got this thought in his head that he won’t have to worry about me being in the picture if something does happen between him and Ashley.
Part three of the crap
David’s birthday party is tonight. Ashley and I had been planning on going together. Well.. since David is Brian’s brother, Brian will be there. That will be uncomfortable.
Part four of the crap
Johnny, Ashley’s ex-boyfriend, will also be at the party. Ashley claims that they don’t have anything going on, but I still feel uncomfortable being with her around him.
Part five of the crap
Ashley is currently at a show with Jim (he plays guitar in a band that is playing in Dallas tonight). So that means that by the time I see her… she will have been with him for 7 hours prior. That thought does not sit well with me.
Part six of the crap
I have never met Jim. Ashley met him at the strip club where she works one night a few months ago. I was talking to Emily, Brian’s sister, on AIM tonight. Apparently, a few days before she left for Minnesota, she actually met Jim over at Ashley’s house. I had this image in my mind of a very unattractive fellow, and was rather happy with the picture I had drawn. I made the mistake of asking Emily if he was good looking. Although Emily was a sweetie and said he was nothing compared to me, she did shoot down the picture I had of him.
Part seven of the crap
Brian thinks that the only reason I am going tonight, is because I know he will be there, and that I don’t want him there with Ashley without me. That couldn’t be farther from the truth. Ashley and I had plans to go together before I even knew he was interested in her.
Initial Conclusion
I am considering not even going tonight, but why should I cancel my plans because of all of this. This isn’t my fault. I didn’t ask for all of this. And apparently, I am the only one who has a problem with all of this.
Realization
Maybe I just need to relax and ignore the crap. I mean who cares, right? Ashley is a great girl, and regardless of what happens, her and I will be friends, and that is important. If I can’t handle all of this mess, I can back out and still have a great friendship with Ashley.
Affirmation
Enough of this. There are going to be lots of girls at this party tonight. Girls I have never met. Why even worry? I will have a great time. I will go with Ashley as predetermined. But, once I get there, if things get too weird I can just find someone else to talk to. No big deal.
Goal
Maybe if I keep repeating all of this, I will believe it.