I’m failing.
I can’t decide if I should give up and try again later, or give myself a quick booster shot and hope that’ll help get me over the edge and not hurt me even worse. Or maybe I can just make it. I don’t know.
Apparently I did something right even though it was unintentional, because I don’t have any left in the house at all. Believe me. I’ve turned this place upside down looking in the last 20 minutes. I keep checking the same places over and over again, like they’ll some how magically appear there. They aren’t. No matter how hard I wish.
On the most un-technical of levels I’ve already failed because, if there were one here, or somehow one magically appears here by way of visitor or an act of Mr. Andy Schindler, I would take it. At least I would right now.