My intuition is something I’ve always learned to rely on. When all other sources, frames of reference, and means of advice were cloudy or unavailable, my intuition was there. Most of the time, it was correct. Granted, it was a bit more skeptical than I’d generally prefer to be. It made me question more things than any individual cares to question in a lifetime. But at least it kept me thinking and kept the situation honest.
It isn’t based on some supernatural power that I posses that no one else has. It isn’t rooted in an ability to read minds, or predict the future. It’s just intuition. A gut feeling obtained from small observances over a period of time. It’s watching someone pour tablespoons of salt over their french fries every day for a year, and then one day, sitting down to lunch, and noticing they didn’t salt their fries at all. Little things. It doesn’t tell me what’s wrong, or what’s right, or what I should and shouldn’t do, and it leaves plenty of room for error in interpretation on my part. However, it does leave a point to begin from.
When that day of unsalted fries comes, it doesn’t tell me why they are unsalted, it merely tells me that something is different. At that point, I can question the situation and hope for the truth. In addition, and usually more importantly in matters of intuition, I can infer what might be different based on other times when something was different or perhaps, if I’m lucky, another time when the fries went unsalted. It isn’t fool-proof and many things must be interpreted. And it’s only as good as the memory and the awareness of the person hearing intuition speak. But I have a pretty good memory, and am generally regarded as more aware than most.
I don’t always act on my intuition. Sometimes I shrug it off and let it go. Other times, I deduce the most likely scenario and choose to keep that information to myself. Other times, I act, but silently and with very little observance by anything other than the keenest eye. And other times, I engage the situation head on, as though the information had been told directly to me by that person. Deciding what to do with the information is part of the intuition.
It hasn’t always been 100% correct. Sometimes my intuition would lead me to believe things — negative things — that were not true. However, very few battles have been lost due to too much forethought and insight. There are only a few downsides, really, to following information that is more skeptical than it should be. A lot of time is wasted worrying about things and looking in to things that end up being nothing, when they could have been spent having good times, and living worry-free. And sometimes, feelings can be hurt when one assumes or acts on negative thoughts and feelings that are unwarranted or untrue.
Sometimes I fool myself into believing that everything is upfront and honest. This isn’t to say that I’ve been lied to, or that things are intentionally being hidden from me. Instead, it’s that people, including myself, don’t always say what they mean, and they don’t always mean what they say. And sometimes, when times are hard, and feelings are hot, and thoughts are confused, things get muddled in the end. And through this clouded view of reality I begin to think it’s safe to ignore my intuition and trust that what is being told to me supersedes it. However, almost every time I have outright ignored my intuition, in the end, I wish I hadn’t, because it always works out, at least in part, to be true.
I’m not going to ignore my intuition any longer. I’d rather spend a little more time worrying, get an ulcer at a younger age than most, and spend more time explaining myself and my actions than to be sorry I didn’t listen to my intuition in the end. Sure, that’s the conservative route. So what.