I got officially offered the job in Syracuse yesterday.
Jess and I carved a big path in the middle of the financial aspects of it. We said if it fell below that wide path, I'd reject it right then and there. If it fell above it, I'd accept the offer (though there'd be no need to do it right then). If it fell inside the path, we'd have to crunch some numbers in order to figure out what was best.
Both lines (the raise, and the relocation package) fell very high above the path we cut. I asked my Dad (who works for the same company) to guess what I got and he just through out the highest number he could imagine anyone getting in the company we work for today. He was right on the nose.
The relocation package is awesome. If needed, Jess and I could easily afford to have our house in Dallas and a house in Syracuse at the same time for 8 months or so before finances even started to break even and cause concern. And that's not even considering how much the raise could pay for (since I haven't quite figured out how much I'm going to owe in New York state taxes if I take it).
Jess and I both feel we'd be stupid not to take it. Even then, it's the hardest decision I've had to make in a long time and the hardest decision Jess has had to make in at least 5 years, if not longer. There are so many facets to consider.
Of course the people we'd be leaving in Dallas is really the only thing holding us back at this point. Our lists of pros and cons are filled with people that we love and care about and hate to even consider life away from. It wasn't until less than a week ago that I realized that most of the people on our list wouldn't pass up an opportunity like this because of Jess and I. I don't fault them for that at all, it's just an observation. Jess and I are great friends. I know this. We're loyal, fun, trustworthy, have an expendable income, are relatable, willing to drive, and always doing something, among many other things. But that doesn't mean we're worth passing up raises, promotions, and hundreds of other tiny and big things that all add up to a greater potential for happiness. Especially since, in this day and age, friendships don't have to fade because of distance. Plane tickets, telephones, communes, webcams, email, text messaging, and instant messaging all make the world a whole lot smaller in day-to-day life.
In fact, I spend more time at work than I do outside of it these days. And, there are more people at this work place that I enjoy spending time with than I have ever had in the past 10 years at my old work place. And because I'm fairly quick to make new friends though very slow at making long lasting relationships, I've even met a few people worth hanging around outside of work.
But there are a few people in our lives today that we have relationships with that losing that aspect of physical presence does feel like a hardship and a very large sacrifice and, maybe, perhaps, not worth it. There's no point in naming names as most of you know who you are. Many of them in Dallas, others are spread all over the world.
We have friends that we see at least every other weekend. Sometimes twice in one weekend. Sometimes even on weekdays. And they live farther away from me now than an overwhelming majority of our other friends.
We have friends that just thinking about the time we will get to spend with them in the coming weekend can make a very bad week more bearable.
Friends that would follow us to New York or have us stay in Dallas for now and drag us with them in the near future when they move away if they could afford to do so both financially and in their current situations. Friends that intend to alter their own future moving plans to be within 30 minutes of us even though this is drastically different than their original plans.
Friends that I called from the airport and told that I forgot to give them a code and a key for the house in case there was an emergency who responded with "if there's an emergency, we'll just bust the door down if we have to and clean up the mess later".
Friends that would stay up to ungodly hours of the night entertaining me because I just couldn't stop thinking, or fidgeting, or just couldn't get to sleep.
Friends that would help calm me down by walking figure 8s in the parking lot of a gas station for what seemed like an eternity.
Friends that would go out of their way to clean up ants and the cat puke that attracted them while sitting our cats while we're away.
Friends that, every time I say "I'm hungry" an almost immediate response in almost every case is "Where are we going?".
Friends that would show up very early on a Saturday morning just to help us move knowing that they aren't moving anytime soon and therefore would never be repaid the favor in that specific way.
Friends that would go out of their way to tip me for a photo session that I would have gladly done for free simply because they know that time and equipment isn't free or even cheap.
Friends that would drive all the way up to the middle of nowhere where we live just to comfort Jess when I was out of town.
Friends that call me when they know I'm sitting in an airport on a long layover just to chat and help me pass the time.
Friends that go out of their way to find out what's wrong every time they realize that I'm not in the best of moods.
Friends that call for no reason at all just to tell me a funny joke they heard.
Friends that think of us even when there isn't something immediate they hope to get in return for doing so.
And even with all that, more than likely, we're going to do it. We're giving ourselves the weekend to think it over. If we decide to go for it, it's going to happen fast. We want to get settled here as soon as possible so Jess can make herself comfortable before the baby gets here.
We both agree that this is probably the very best thing for us. If you feel like we're wronging you some how by doing so, put yourself in our shoes and tell me what you'd do. I'd honestly love to hear it.
