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lessons about women and dating

From today’s Wrecked Poll: Name a good story telling song and give a synopsis.

This world is filled with women who don’t know what they want: act interested and they turn away, be non-committal and they take offense. This story is for the men who just can’t seem to figure it out.

Imagine you attend a party. There are lots of girls there dancing and most of the attendees are wearing as little clothing as possible. You see a girl that you would really enjoy sleeping with, yet you stand there and do nothing at all.

The next day, you attend another gathering. You gorge yourself on the food and, when the music starts, find yourself unable to dance. A girl sits down next to you and tells you she’d really like to dance with you. What should you do? Take your overweight body on to the dance floor and just dance!

Another scenario: you’re alone and have been for a while. It seems that no matter where you turn you’re only meeting ugly women and, despite your failures, you aren’t going to stoop that low. As a last resort you’re considering joining a Monastery and taking a vow of celibacy. So you decide to see a movie and you could care less about the $5 it cost you to get in. Just as the room darkens you notice an attractive female in the front row. She’s easy to spot because she’s wearing yellow clothing. She breaks theater etiquette and shouts at you telling you to sit next to her. With complete disregard for your own safety you run from your seat to the one next to her in the now dark theater. So, what do you do next? Make out!

In urban areas women dress to attract men. But, in your current condition you’re going to get turned down time and time again. They want a man with money, a job and a car. You have none of these things. Often these same women will dress themselves up and lay on the beach just waiting to attract a man who can take care of her. My advice to you: fake it! Most women will be fooled if you pretend to have money and success and truly own the role. And, when a girl finally approaches you, what should you do? Take advantage of her just like she was trying to do to you!

Final Scenario: Your best friend’s brother is getting married. He’d like you to be the best man. You’re not sure why he would want you to be his best man instead of his brother, but that’s beside the point, so you accept. As the bride walks down the aisle on her big day, you realize that this means there’s one less girl in this world available for you. This gets you a bit upset and distracted. A bridesmaid sees you and confuses your behavior with an attempt to get her attention. She responds positively and this makes you feel good because this particular bridesmaid has fairly large breasts. When the reception starts she informs you that she’d like to dance to a “different groove”. Thanks to the lessons I’ve outlined here, I have no doubt you’ll know exactly what to do next: bust a move!

— “Bust a Move” by Young MC

I encourage you to do this as well. Hopefully, Nic will post his because his is truly king.