Comments on: this old house

By: Daniel

Daniel — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 20:02:43 +0000

I didn't overlook it... but you're right... I should have mentioned it.

There are pluses and minuses here.

I don't mind taking photos that don't enrich my artistically. I enjoy
working with people and I enjoy the artistic leads that working for
other people tends to generate.

The downsides are these:

I'd need to do only location work, charge a lot more in order to rent
a studio on a job-by-job basis, really rake in enough dough to have a
full time studio, or figure out how to build a studio in my house
again.

Being a single parent means I can't just take off a day whenever I
need to because my partner will pick up the slack. If monday is my day
with Celeste, then I can't do a photoshoot monday night without lots
of work and negotiation. Even if that wasn't an issue, Jess and I
still haven't worked out an official pattern for custody, so, I can't
even be sure what days off I have.

But, if I can work out the above two things, this idea is absolutely
on the table. I was just discussing it with my mom the other day,
actually.

And, even though I'm not actively advertising for new work right now,
I'm always willing to take it. I actually have a photoshoot lined up
for this weekend.

I'd love to photograph you and your family.

By: Daniel

Daniel — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 19:57:25 +0000

We intend to make it legal once we can agree on how it should be.

The problem is, trying to make it legal before we both agree means we
have to pay our lawyers to agree for us… and that's a lot of money.

By: Jim Reverend

Jim Reverend — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 15:02:43 +0000

By: Jim Reverend

Jim Reverend — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 14:57:25 +0000

We intend to make it legal once we can agree on how it should be.

The problem is, trying to make it legal before we both agree means we
have to pay our lawyers to agree for us… and that's a lot of money.

By: lys1123

lys1123 — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 03:29:24 +0000

I think you might be overlooking an option here. You alluded to the idea, but didn't put in on the table.

Option 5: Make More Money

Based on your apartment option I'm thinking you need around $500 a month more to make ends meet. If you were to hang out your shingle and treat your photography like a real business then I have no doubt you could make that much, even doing it part-time. It would probably mean taking photos that don't enrich you artistically, but I think you should consider the advantages of the option. Start by contacting people, asking if anyone would be willing to do a paid session, and seeing what sort of response you get. You can test the waters on this idea fairly easily if you are willing to put yourself out there.

Incidentally, if you do give this idea a try you can put my family down for a paid session.

By: Sarah

Sarah — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 03:10:00 +0000

I’m not sure which option is best for you right now, but whatever you do, if it involves child support AT ALL you have to do it through the state. Let me tell you why. If this goes to court, and the state says you have to pay child support, even if you have been paying money to Jess of your own free will, if it’s not through the attorney general, it doesn’t count. And they will look for what you owe back to the beginning of when you guys split. So, say, years down the road, if it got ugly (and I am totally not implying it would, this is all worst case scenario), and there was no legal record of the money you paid, you would owe it all again. And then some. So even if you guys are doing this amicably, and don’t really feel the need to, you should anyway just so it’s on the up and up legally. That way no one gets screwed down the line. And if you go into it agreeing on stuff, the state is all for that. They will, in most cases, basically just let you fill in the blanks on the agreement.

By: Jim Reverend

Jim Reverend — Thu, 19 Mar 2009 13:02:14 +0000

I wish I could ask for more than $1000/mo. They just wont pay it up
here. Jess and I had it on the market for about 4 months listed at
$1200/mo. We got some bites, but no takers. Then again, I found out
after the fact that Jess was turning away requests to see the house, so,
maybe that's why.

An apartment would be okay... but I'm starting to think I would almost
prefer to live with my parents over an apartment. So... if I did that, I
might just say there with them until I could buy another house.

So that's the big debate now. Stay here or move in with mom. If I stay
here I'll seek out a roommate whenever one comes around. And if I move
in with my mom I'll stay here until I can rent it or sell it and, if I
try for some set period of time (3 months ... 6 months) then I'm going
to start making changes to the house to at least get it the way that I
want it now that Jess doesn't have a say.

Thank you for your thoughts. You rock.

By: Julie

Julie — Thu, 19 Mar 2009 02:58:39 +0000

You should stay with your parents, at least for a few months, while you rent out the house and use that money to pay off some of your CC debt. But ask for more than 1000 per month, I've been to your house, you can get more. nick and I pay 1200 in rent and our house is smaller and not as nice. Once you pay off some of that debt, than look for an apartment.

By: Jim Reverend

Jim Reverend — Wed, 18 Mar 2009 20:07:46 +0000

It could be up to 5 years before I can really get out from under it
though. Is it still reasonable when considered that long term?

My parents are also moving to another city within the next 2 years. I
would have to move with them, in that case, which should be fine for
work, but might make other things more difficult.

By: and what about the kitties?! – revjim.net

and what about the kitties?! – revjim.net — Wed, 18 Mar 2009 20:01:31 +0000

[...] of you seem to be indicating that the best solution to my housing problem is to live with my [...]

By: Rob...

Rob... — Wed, 18 Mar 2009 19:43:44 +0000

I 100% agree with Cynthia and and ramona – if you're parents are willing, then go there until you can offload the house.

Rob…

By: Jim Reverend

Jim Reverend — Wed, 18 Mar 2009 18:45:42 +0000

The $2000 a month included bills. Mortgage is only $1400 a month and the
bills would belong to the renter.

Multiple renters would make liability a chore for me. Probably not worth it.

Consulting an attorney might not be a bad idea. However, there is a lot of
free info on the web. Most of it says that, if we agree then we agree and
that's that. And if we don't we go to a judge.

With a judge, it's pretty cut and dry. Whoever gets primary support the
other pays child support. Assets are liquidated and split when possible.
When there is joint custody, it's usually because the parents could agree
and generally no child support is awarded.

By: Jez

Jez — Wed, 18 Mar 2009 17:40:11 +0000

Wow, that's a dilly of a pickle you're in there.

In regards to an apartment, I think your math might be off. You currently pay $2000/mo, if you rent it out for $1000/mo that still leaves you having to pay $1000. Get an apartment for $800 + $200 in utilities would equal another $1000/mo, so you'd still be paying $2000/mo, am I right?

If you were going to rent the whole thing out, maybe you could have multiple renters. 3 people at even $500/mo would put you in a better place.

Living with your parents: Might be the best option, provided you could find someone to rent your house out to. That would save you quite a bit of money.

Roommates: A great option provided you can find someone that is interested and that you trust. That's the hardest part.

Re: Child Support, maybe this is a case where it would be a good idea to consult an attorney? Getting something worked out that works for all parties is the best course of action and sometimes attorneys can be helpful in that regard.

I wish you luck

By: Jim Reverend

Jim Reverend — Wed, 18 Mar 2009 15:25:51 +0000

Right. Finding a roommate I can trust and that won't lead to both of
our hatred and destruction will be difficult. I can't just put on ad
on craigslist and hope. There's no way I'd trust my daughter with a
stranger in the house. So... it would mean living in the house for a
bit and hoping to meet someone that just happen to fit the bill. Also
unlikely.

My parents are probably the best option. And... really... it's not a
bad one. Not in the grand scheme of things.

I guess an option I didn't mention is that I can stay where I am, do
what I've been doing, and get rid of important things that are just
less important (cell phone, internet access, etc) and/or simply not
pay child support until I'm ordered to do so by someone with
authority.

Generally, in a joint custody (50/50) arrangement when indicated by
the courts, child support is not paid by either party and daycare
costs, when required, are split equally. I'd happily submit to this
arrangement and would even agree to cover any and all additional
expenses including food, clothes, and whatever else that Celeste
required.

And you're right... from your place to Keller and from your place to
my house is roughly the same. :)

By: ramona

ramona — Wed, 18 Mar 2009 14:11:52 +0000

if you truly feel like you can live with them, i would go for the living with parents and renting it out first, abandonment second (given you don't need to apply for credit any time soon), and all of the other options equally suck, especially roommate. fastest way to ruin a friendship if you know the person, and if they're a stranger, well, you don't want a stranger in the house with celeste.
i think child support is absurd, since you're taking care of celeste most of the time, but like you said, that's another discussion. and you're a good guy. so…..
keller's not that much farther from here, and i love a good jaunt to southlake town center/central market ;)