image by 27147

As we live a life of ease
Every one of us has all we need,
Sky of blue, and sea green,
In our yellow submarine!

I’m amazed at how many of my friends are interested in living together. It makes me believe that maybe the culture I’m looking for here in Dallas isn’t lost after all. I’ve seen an outpouring of ideas and offers from lots of people over the past week or so and it’s really helped me flesh this out a bit.

One of the most interesting offers was to share a home with a family in Austin. The family is already very dear to my heart and like-minded in terms of family and responsibility. And I long ago decided that Austin was an ideal city for me if I was going to stay in Texas. This seemed like a perfect situation.

But, the more I consider it the more I realize how much risk and difficulty there is involved with it. I’d have to take C away from her Mom. It’s only a few hours away and she’d still be able to see her almost as often as she’d like. But, it adds some complication. Factor in that I’d need to drop everything, move, look for a job, rent out my house, and leave everything I know and love here in DFW, it was just too much to do all at once. I still think this is ideal, and if I haven’t found what I’m looking for in Dallas within a few years, I’ll start looking out that way again. But for now, I think I have to let that go.

Another amazing offer I received was to share a home with a family in North Richland Hills. This place is beautiful! There’s lots of room! I’ve been friends (though not incredibly close friends) with half of the parental unit for over 10 years. I met the rest of the family and we all got along wonderfully. I’m still having conversations with them and working some bits out in my head.

But, as I see it now, there are a few limiting factors. Despite being a huge home, there are only 4 bedrooms. 3 of them are occupied by this family, so C and I would share a room. We do that now, so that’s okay. But as she gets older I’d prefer she share with another child. There’s nothing to say she couldn’t share with one of the other kids though. So that’s a wait-and-see kind of thing. The other limiting factor is that this house very much belongs to this family. I had envisioned a “our home” mentality and perhaps this would blossom into that as time progressed, but that isn’t the feel I got right away. So, another wait-and-see. The biggest limiting factor, though, is that, because after I move in all the rooms would be taken, it will be, at most, a two family home. Again, the family there said that there might be opportunity for more but wants to do it on a wait-and-see basis. So there’s a whole lot of wait-and-see.

I’m okay with wait-and-see. But I’d like to limit the disruptions to my daughter’s life as much as possible. With a move, a change in schooling/daycare, a whole new city, and the need to untie us from our current house, that’s a LOT to go with for so much wait-and-see. I’m still talking with them, and we’re going to have lots of sleep overs in the future, both to see where this goes and also because I’m excited to have met a friendly, open, like-minded family with an open-door policy so similar to my own.

So that leaves me with three options for now. I intend to pursue all three until one pans out.

I am going to keep looking for an existing home that I could share with another family. Ideally, there’d be room for at least three families but I’m flexible there for the right situation. Proximity to Irving, Denton, or Dallas is ideal, though not required. If you know of anyone that lives in a home with a room or two that they would spare and are interested in an intentional community of this nature, please let me know or send them my way.

I am going to think of ways to make my current home more suited to multi-family living and seek out families to share it with. I got an offer from a friend who would be willing to share my home. However, with her and her daughter here, that exhausts all of the “conventional” sleeping space my home has to offer (and that’s with our daughters sharing a room). The rooms in my house are large, however. So I’m looking for creative ways to split them into smaller spaces suitable for children as well adults who would consider even more open-minded living arrangements (like large rooms being shared by adults, etc). If you’re creative and budget-minded and would like to help me think of ways to split up this space let me know. If you would be open to “interesting” living arrangements with a very small financial obligation, contact me.

Finally, I’m looking to buy a home more suitable to what I want. Something large-ish with emphasis on the number of rooms not the size of them. Ideally in the Denton, Coppell, or Dallas (Oak Cliff, likely) areas. If you know of a home like this, or would be interested in helping to find one and share it, please let me know.

Image by James Booth

Have you ever heard Akon’s “Right Now”? WAIT! STOP! Don’t click that link! I don’t want to be responsible for what may happen afterward. I’m sure you’ve heard it. I’m quite far removed from the “cool guy” scene and I’ve heard it before now.

Maybe in the bathroom at that bootie-bumping club. Your “accidental” stop on the Top-40 station on your way across the dial. Standing outside the changing room waiting for your new fling to try on what must be the 40th pair of shoes. Through earbuds in an attempt to drown out the nagging about how fat and lazy you are that reminds you far too much of the last fling you had and this one isn’t even half as cute. You’ve heard it.

This song must be the worst song ever written. Ever.

I wanna make love right now now now.
Wish we never broke up right now now now.
We need to link up right now now now.

So why didn’t I just turn it off?

I started Couch to 5K (C25K, A program designed to take you from the Couch to running a 5K in 9 weeks) today. I had done it once before in December of 2008 but was abruptly halted due to (ah hell let’s use the oh-so-PC-term) Life Change Events. Unwilling to give myself any further cause for delay and working toward being a satisficier instead of a maximizer, I opted to let Pandora choose my music for me this time around. I’ve heard lots of warnings (no more ColdPlay!) about how inappropriate Pandora’s music selections can be. Trapping myself into them by starting a run and not wanting to stop to fiddle with music was probably not the best idea.

Don’t do this.

I picked one song that I thought was a good song to run to. Something with an upbeat tempo, uplifting lyrics, and not anything too heavy or thought provoking. I picked “I Gotta Feeling” by the Blackeyed Peas. Yeah, not the best song ever written, but it met my criteria and is apropos for my day considering I have a hot playdate tonight. (Yes, I used the words “hot” and “playdate” at the same time. Admit it, you’re jealous of me and my high-rollin’ life.)

I can’t lie
Watching everyday that goes by
‘Till I get you back I’m gon’ try
‘Cause you are the apple in my eye

Pandora spit out track after terrible track of the most boring, uninspired, uninteresting, nonsense music I have ever heard. Ok, that isn’t entirely true. It did break out with Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believin’” which was quite welcome considering what had come before it and what was to follow. But that was the one and only exception and it isn’t even remotely similar to the song I seeded it with. Among all of them, however, “Right Now” was the worst.

The run went well, though. Day 1 of Week 1 is meant to be easy. It wasn’t.

20 minutes of a 90 second walk followed by a 60 second run sandwiched in between two 5 minute walks to warm up and cool down. I traveled a little over 2 miles giving me a just under 15 minute mile. Pathetic I know, but it sure beats the running I did yesterday (“hey, I’m going run into the kitchen for another bowl of popcorn”). I can tell how far off I am from where I was last time by how many streets in my neighborhood I was able to cover. Before I could hit each of them once and a couple of them a second time. This time, I skipped an entire chunk. But it felt good, anyway. Okay, the very first running interval felt good. Even the second one did. The eight one sucked and I felt like my heart was about to rip itself out of my chest for a more suitable mate.

I want you to fly with me
I miss how you lie with me
I wish you could dine with me
The one that’ll grind with me

But still this song haunts me. You’ve heard it, right? The guy is basically saying, “I’m lonely and I want to have sex with you.” And he’s doing so in the worst possible way, over and over again. Any oversexed Junior High student with a Casio keyboard and Autotune could have made it.

Here, erase it from your mind. Instead, listen to a terrible Ukulele cover of “Right Now” that is, somehow, actually better than the original. What, that didn’t help?

Image By Sarah Bodri

For over two years I’ve been taking baby steps and big jumps toward simplifying my life. A couple of time I’ve touched on simplifying my diet as well, but have never really made a strong effort. That’s about to change.

The over all plan is to find myself eating mostly raw foods — vegetables, fruits, nuts, seeds, etc — as often as I feel the need to do so through out the day. Then to supplement that with 2-3 larger cooked meals per week. Anything that comes in a package (including cereal) will be removed from the house entirely with the exception of a few forms of easy to eat on-the-go type foods — wholesome granola bars, dried fruits, etc. Someday, I’d like to even make that stuff at home. But I’m getting ahead of myself.

So, my first little baby step is to deal with Lunch. It’s a good place to start because it hardly affects my daughter, will buy me some free time during the middle of the work day, and will drastically reduce one of the sore spots in my budget. So here’s the plan.

I will bring my lunch to work four days a week. It will consist of only raw foods or of leftovers from dinners that week. On the fifth day, I’m free to go out with a friend and I should do so without worry about cost, or time, or calories and just enjoy myself.

This little baby step should give me a good step toward weight loss and hunger detection and will also server as a good taste for which raw foods work well and how to prepare them for “on the go” consumption.

Wish me luck, or, better yet, join me and encourage me. Picnic lunch dates could be a lot of fun.

My vision of the Mini-Commune is between 2 and 5 families (depending on the size of those families and the size of the dwelling) sharing a single, larger house. Ideally, the house would have lots of smaller rooms to be used as bedrooms as well as several larger rooms to be used as communal living spaces. Certainly some properties will lend themselves better to this than others but, as long as it’s large enough, almost anything can be made to work.

The benefits of even the mini-commune are quite impressive.

First, there’s the sheer financial aspect of it all. Based on a house I’ve been able to find in the area and average expenses, with even 3 families living together the monthly cost would be around $575/family. When you factor in group meals (less eating out), bulk purchases, and reduced needs for travel, you save even more. Consider the fact that, under this arrangement, it might be possible to get rid of as many as half of the vehicles owned by the group, there’s even more savings. Once you bundle in the social aspects of always having a “family” of people around to lend a helping hand, to make tedious tasks more enjoyable, to provide comfort, and to encourage it, the cons seem entirely manageable.

The cons, of course, having to share a space with other people. If people are inconsiderate, rude, sloppy, or selfish, sharing a space with them can be difficult if not impossible. Obviously, this would require appropriately minded people. I think it’s very important to select fellow commune (or mini-commune) members based on their nature and their lifestyle and how close to your own that those things are more so than how well your interests mesh with theirs or how close of friends you may be now. As you get deeper into the communal unit, more cons can arise, like not having certain amenities (cars, showers, etc) available to you the very second that you want them. It is very much about personal sacrifice in order to increase the benefits for all, including yourself. However, in an ideal commune, these issues will be worked out as a matter of routine. In the fully fledged commune, one could alter the dwelling to more closely match the needs of those that lived there. In this mini-commune one would have to be willing to adapt to what was available.

The fully fledged commune would, of course, be able to grow vegetables, raise a garden, and contribute space to the greater community as well. These things would only be possible in much smaller doses in a mini-commune.

I haven’t fully fleshed out where I’d like to live. But, my tentative selections are Denton, Coppell, Western Dallas (as long as we have home schoolers), and “The Sticks”. If you’re interested — truly interested — in joining let me know. And, if you have any advice (other than, simply, “COMMUNES SUCK”) I’d love to hear it.

“Pretend you live for a living.”

–Buddy Wakefield

Flickr’s Navel Gazing Society (otherwise known as Explore) is certainly no measure of greatness. Neither that of a photograph, nor that of the life of a photographer. But accepting it as an indicator I present the following:

I had 46 photos hit explore from 4/5/2005 until 11/23/2007.  That’s 18 per year.

My daughter was born in 12/2007.

I had 14 photos hit explore from 11/23/2207 until 12/13/2008. That’s 13 per year. A pretty steep drop from before, but still one a month. A baby does that to you and I wouldn’t want it any other way.

My wife left in 01/2009. After a few months of depression I was left refreshed, ready to take on the world, and with a young child under my care for roughly 75% of my previously “free” time.

I had 0 photos hit explore from 12/13/2008 until now. That’s 0 per year.

Again, I’m not complaining. I’m just trying to work it out in my head.

You see, the thing is, I’m very efficient, yet terrible at multi-tasking. Let me do one thing at a time and I’ll do it quickly and very well. Make me do two things at once and I’ll more than likely fail at both of them. Caring for a child takes at least some portion of my attention almost all of the time.

I don’t have time to take the photos I used to. It’s not that I don’t have time to hold a camera point it at things and release the shutter. Many would argue that a child makes a beautiful interesting photographic subject. And, despite always carrying far too many things, keeping a camera (or three) on me at all times is something I’m quite good at. I take plenty of photos. But photography is about more than just pressing a button. It’s about seeking out the light. It’s about waiting for the perfect moment. Looking for light and waiting for a photo are two things incredibly hard to do with a young child. They don’t like to sit still. And, doing so while watching a child is multi-tasking. So, I’m terrible at it.

I also don’t have time to edit. Editing photos is a two part process. First, we throw away the junk. Then, we make the good stuff look better. This takes time. Lots of it. Sitting in front of a computer isn’t something a young child enjoys, unless they enjoy it so much that they want to help, at which point, you’re not getting the job done at all. The good news is, I can do this when she’s asleep. The bad news is, that’s the only time I have to do lots of other things as well.

Finally, I don’t have time to promote. I used to spend a lot of time viewing photos, commenting on photos, discussing photos, and sharing photos. I have all but stopped doing any of these things.

So, now to the important part. How can I get back some of what I had without losing the wonderful things I have now? Because I can’t multi-task, I have to find ways to make what I do more efficient and to find ways to allow me to juggle tasks better.

Of course, just because you’re not me or not in this same situation doesn’t mean that these tips won’t make you more efficient too.

1) Take fewer photos

With film, releasing the shutter on your camera was a commitment to spending both time and money in order to actually see the image. Photographers acknowledged this and very few were willing to release the shutter until they were sure they had it right. When digital came along the mentality shifted: it’s just digital. Click away! Sort them out later!

In theory, if you’re looking for a certain shot taking as many as possible helps ensure you get the right one. In practice, if one of them is terrible, the rest probably will be too. Multiple shots approaching with different ideas and at multiple angles is one thing and certainly a good idea. But taking photographs just in case they might be good amounts to nothing but waste.

By spending more time looking and less time clicking, I might be more likely to anticipate a shot. And having fewer photos will drastically reduce the amount of time I spend in Phase 1 of editing, and somewhat reduce the time I spend in Phase 2.

2) Bring a Photo Friend

Bringing along a photographically inclined friend, particularly one with similar distractions (i.e. children, in my case) leaves us both with the ability to explore an idea more closely. As something strikes me as worthy of further examination, being able to trust my child in the other person’s hands as I explore an idea more fully will let me free my mind completely for the task. And my friend gets the same benefit. Additionally, as children often become the subjects of photographs, it allows one of us to photograph while the other helps adjust and collect the children.

3) Involve the Children

This is only a small break, but every little bit counts. But sending the children seeking for the elements you’re looking for in your photo, their minds focus a bit more and it makes them easier to monitor. Kids are great at looking for shadows, sticks, flowers, trees, letters, numbers, and things like this. Just don’t ask them to look for soft lighting on the side of a fire hydrant with minimal background distraction. Or, at least wait until they are 12 or so.

Involving them in the 1st phase of editing (and parts of the 2nd phase as well) is also a good idea. You’ll need software that allows you to rate photos quickly and with at least 3 or 4 different levels of rating (junk, keep for fun/memories, good, awesome). With this in place, children love to look at photos from an adventure they just took. Especially if there are photos of people and things they recognize. Making a habit out of unloading a photo card in the same way we unload our backpacks after an adventure will bring a child to anticipate doing so.

4) Involve Friends for Promotion

Nothing makes me want to photograph MORE than knowing that my work is enjoyed and appreciated. Promotion allows this to be fully realized. Friends can be a fantastic resource for promotion. Between Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, Buzz, Blogs, and Email your friends can quickly and easily help get the word out about how wonderful a certain photos of yours is. Take the time to share with your friends and ask them to do the promotion for you.

And, if you are the friend of a photographer *cough, ahem, ME!*, share their work. Expose their art. Most social media outlets have icons you can drag to your browser toolbar to make sharing as simple as clicking a button. Here are some for Facebook, Twitter, Google Buzz, and Tumblr.

I hope this helps you with your photography. Do you have any other ideas to share that can help get better photos with a partially distracted mind?

Christmas Eve, Celeste and I didn’t quite make it to our friends house as we had planned. Sure, I have AWD. Sure I could have made it. But after hearing reports of over 300 accident reports in Fort Worth alone, it was no longer the ice, the snow, or my vehicle that I was concerned about. It was all those other drivers. So we stayed put at my mom’s house despite the fact that everyone else had left for church/other festivities.

Christmas was awesome. Despite Celeste never taking a nap worth mentioning and having more sugar in one day than any 2 year old should be allowed in her entire second year, she did quite well. Yeah, she was cranky from time to time toward the end, but, I’m getting quite good at offsetting it.

She loved all of her gifts. The biggest hits were the play kitchen my parents got her, the piggy bank my sister got her, and the playsilks that I got her. I thought the wooden cars and trees that Santa got her would be a big hit too, but she hasn’t given them a second glance yet.

The only odd, strange, unpredictable aspect of Christmas was, once again, my parents. At some point in the not too distant past they decided that immediately following Christmas they’d be taking a vacation to Arkansas to photograph the many waterfalls of the Buffalo River, a worthwhile adventure by any account. But they decided to do so and the hell with anything else.

Celeste’s birthday is today (the 26th). It was going to be celebrated today. We were going to spend one more night at my mom’s and celebrate it over there, saving them and my sister a trip out, and ensuring that my brother would come. My mom, instead, suddenly pushed very hard to have it after dinner on Christmas evening citing that they wanted to get a head start on their vacation. So… that’s exactly what we did. Almost immediately following cake and presents we were — though never specifically stated — kicked out of the house.

It was a mad dash, without reason, to pack up all of our stuff, get it all in the car, and get out on the road. Celeste was crying. Everyone was far too busy to help with anything because they were all packing up their stuff too. I’m glad that C’s mom decided to spend Christmas afternoon with us, for all the obvious reasons of having her there for Celeste on Christmas day but also to help soothe her as everything turned to chaos.

Ideally, I’d have stayed at my mom’s a few more hours and drove back in the evening when Celeste would have slept. Would have made it easier to unload the car and I hate making her take 1 hour road trips to and from when I don’t have to.

All in all it worked out fine, of course, I just don’t particularly care for the the unexpected scramble, nor do I tolerate it very well. I kept imagining myself with a friend/partner who could say “Daniel, calm down!” in the nicest way possible to help keep me even instead of all stressed out. Yeah, I know I should be more “independent” than that, and I do okay on my own. But, I’ve always believed that the true power of a team was based in the ability to rely on each others strengths in order to help cover or improve each others weaknesses. Yes, some of you dream of being rockstars, super models, pimp daddys, and race car drivers. Not me. I just dream of being unstressed, of breathing fresh air, and of laughing as much as possible.

No Christmas recap would be complete without a list of Christmas booty (unfortunately, there was no Christmas “Bootie” to be had, but that can wait for another day). I got a shopvac from my sister, which I am very excited about. I got a netbook from my parents which will hopefully make travel with the kiddo and updating new thoughts and photos a little easier (I’m typing this on it right now). I got a pretty candle/decorative thing from my brother. Celeste loves little decorations, especially those that hold candles, so I’m sure this will be a hit. I also got a nice little pile of random stocking stuffs from that fat guy in a red suit. More than anything I’m excited about all of Celeste’s gifts and eager to see her play with them and watch her imagination create new uses for them.

Merry Christmas to you all. May you find your own life filled with many blessings during this coming year and may you offer even more blessing to those you love and care about.

I’m not going to my brothers. That amounted to the most work for the least benefit.

However, a friend (Hi, Skwid!) has offered an invitation to their Christmas festivities. There will even be another kid there and several other friends.

Staying home for Christmas Eve and Christmas Morning just doesn’t sound ideal. Several of you wrote to say that doing your own thing in your own home with your own kids is the nicest way to spend the holiday. And, in principal, I’d agree. But my situation makes that less desirable. If we only leave gifts under the tree for which there is someone present to receive it, then every gift will be for Celeste, either from me, from a few long distance family members, or from some fat guy in a red coat and silly hat. There are no other kids here. There are no other adults here. And Celeste isn’t old enough to have made or bought me anything on her own. Anyone else that could have helped her do so didn’t. Or at least, if they did, I don’t know about it and the gift isn’t here to open. While I’m a big fan of making our own traditions and having our own little life, I don’t ever want Christmas to amount to a tower of gifts in front of a child and nothing more. Because, to me, that’s not what Christmas is about at all.

To me Christmas is supposed to be about family (chosen and inherited), friendship, and togetherness. It’s supposed to be about giving, and sharing, and believing. It’s supposed to be about hope, and rebirth. The best way to make that happen is to spend it with people that care about us and that want us around.

My parents (well, my dad anyway. my mom still isn’t talking to me) have said, “come whenever you want”. And while that may seem ideal and certainly is from a “cram the most into two days as possible” standpoint, I want to feel wanted. That doesn’t make me feel wanted. Christmas in the past has always been at my parent’s and it has always been mandatory. There was simply no doubt about where everyone was going to be on Christmas day. If you had other stuff going on, that was fine, but you’d better show up and you’d better be there a lot. I liked it that way. Between me spending every other Christmas in Canada with my ex-wife, my older brother moving to Vermont, my sister desiring to have Christmas in her new home the year she bought it, and my brother having to share his kid with his ex-wife on the holidays, the ritual was strained. It could have lasted anyway. Because it was NEVER about WHERE we met, only about who we were meeting with and why. But, all of that fell through the cracks.

I put a lot of importance on ritual: with family and friends, in our day to day lives, and in my own spirituality. This is part of what makes living my life so special to me but also what makes it so difficult from time to time. If I didn’t, then these days would just be ordinary days like any other day and it wouldn’t matter nearly as much what we did or who we saw or whether everything worked out in an ideal fashion. I give Celeste gifts all the time. And we spend time with people all the time. And we spend many, many, many days and nights home together alone. And these days should be no different. Except they are.

So, all of this means that spending time with friends on Christmas Eve is really the best possible option. Friends that have gone out of their way to make sure that we know we’re invited and very welcome. It is, sadly, also the most difficult. Since I’d rather not have Celeste wake up in our empty house on Christmas morning this means that I’d have to drive out to my parent’s house late that night after Christmas Eve festivities, get our room ready for sleeping, put a toddler to bed, unpack a car full of gifts, and then get myself settled in. Or, go to my parent’s house earlier, set everything up, then head out for a lovely Christmas Eve, then head back.

So, in the midst of this pile of wrapping paper and ribbon and tape and too many cups of tea, I’m trying to figure out a plan of action that’s actually going to work, involve the least amount of driving, leave me with the least amount of stress and, most of all, let Celeste have the best possible time.

This is the first Christmas Celeste will really remember. I’m trying to make it really nice for her and it seems like my family is doing everything they can to combat that.

For starters, I flat out told my mom that I hadn’t completely decided how I was going to do the “Santa” story with Celeste but that, whatever it was, her mom and I would work it out together so that we had the same idea. So, the next time my mom got Celeste alone, she told her only two things about Christmas: 1) Santa says “HO HO HO” and 2) Santa brings you new toys. Skip over the spirit of giving, all of the fun folk lore, the idea that Santa brings every kid toys, and just focus on the worst aspect of it all: “Santa brings new toys”.

But that’s just an annoyance more than anything. My mom has also decided she’s not speaking to me. Or, rather, speaking to me as little as possible so as to not seem like she’s doing the whole “I’m not talking to you” thing. On top of that, my mom and my brother live 15 minutes from each other. Of all of us, they live the closest. Yet they are the two deciding to be stubborn and unwilling to leave their own houses Christmas morning or Christmas eve. So, no matter what, I can have one or the other, but not both, even though neither of them have anyone else coming over unless Celeste and I show up. I really wanted Celeste to enjoy Christmas with family around, including her cousin and her grandparents. But, my family is making it difficult.

These are my options, I think:

1) Spend Christmas Eve/Morning at my brother’s house. His son will be gone from 5pm to 9pm on Christmas Eve which means it’ll just be Celeste and him and I for a big chunk of the evening. Then, when his son gets home, we can leave out some cookies and such and then do the whole Christmas thing in the morning. Then, we’d go to my mom’s house and he’d go do a few other things and eventually show up there himself.

2) Spend Christmas Eve/Morning at my mom’s house. My sister won’t be there for Christmas Eve. And my mom isn’t talking to me. So, it’d basically just be Celeste and my Dad and I. Then in the morning my sister would be there. And then, later still in the morning, my brother would show up. This is slightly better because Celeste will have grandparents and an aunt and uncle there, but slightly worse because she won’t have any other kids to enjoy it with.

3) Spend Christmas Eve at our house and show up to my mom’s house on Christmas Day when my brother does. This is slightly better because we can have our own traditions and our own house and I can really make it special for Celeste in whatever way I believe to be best. But this is a lot worse because it’ll just be her and I for most of it and I really want to to be about togetherness.

I know I’m making this into more than it needs to be. It just frustrates me, that’s all. I think, more than anything, I hate having to beg people to spend time with me, and hate even more to have to beg people to spend time with my daughter, and yet that’s exactly what I feel like I’m doing.

At any rate, I’d really like this one to be in a less hidden place. Yet, at the same time, I worry greatly about employability. I do have a daughter to care for after all. And money isn’t everything, but it sure helps.

So I ask all of you…

Have visible tattoos ever affected your ability to get a job, keep a job, earn a fair wage, or receive proper service from various establishments?

Even if it didn’t happen to you, have you ever seen someone discriminated against because of a visible tattoo?

I’m probably going to do it anyway. My left forearm. But… I’d like to hear out both sides before committing.

So I got a rental car that day. Two days later, C and I stopped at the body shop to get my stuff out of the car before releasing it. It’s moments like these that I am so happy that Celeste is such a good kid, because I don’t know what I’d have done otherwise. She sat and played quietly in the back of the broken car while I quickly pulled all of our stuff out of it. Then we headed home to pack a bag and then head to my mom’s house.

My mom and sister offered to watch Celeste on Saturday so I could go car shopping. Without thier help I don’t know what I would have done. Car buying is not easy. And even less easy with an antsy 2 year old.

9 hours later, I was a Subaru Outback owner. More on that later. My brother-in-law saved my ass that day too. First, he came up to the dealership to help me make sure I asked all the important questions. Then, he went way out of his way to help me return my rental car so that I wouldn’t be an hour away from home with a kid and 2 cars. Once again, I don’t know what I would have done had he not offered to help.

So, thanks to my Mom, my sister, and my brother-in-law, I managed to take care of something that would have been all but impossible to do on my own.

I missed Celeste more that Saturday than I usually do. When her mom has her, I guess I’ve learned to somewhat tune that out, because there’s nothing I can do to change it. But with my daughter just around the corner at my mom’s house, on one of the longest and best days of all — Saturday — it was so hard to not just run away from the stuff that needed to be done so I could go spend the day with her. If I hadn’t, though, my only other opportunity would have been the Tuesday after Thanksgiving and I didn’t know how long I’d be able to keep the rental.

So, all in all, I am grateful for my family today, and grateful that I wrapped this mess up as quickly as possible so we can get back to normal life, whatever that is.

Many of you have asked for the recipe. I used, basically, my dear friend Melissa‘s recipe. Only I halved it, and added a few “Daniel” touches.

Cookies for YOU!

Daniel and Melissa’s Cherry Pumpkin Cookies

Wet Works:
1/2 cup butter (1 stick) (softened)
1 cup white sugar
1 cup pureed pumpkin
1 egg
1 tsp vanilla

Dry Works:
1 tsp cinnamon
2 1/4 cup flour
2 tsp baking powder
2 tsp baking soda

Chunky Stuff:
1/2 cup chopped dried cherries (or cranberries)
1/2 cup sliced almonds
1 tbsp orange zest

Method:
Typical cookie method applies. Mix the wet stuff together. Mix the dry stuff together. Then put the dry stuff into the wet stuff and mix it together. Then throw in the chunky bits. Cook at 375 for about 10 minutes. Serve with cold milk.

Yields about 3 dozen.

I spent 3 hours getting ready for the day, having breakfast, and packing bags. There was just too much to fit into too little of space. My mom gave Celeste a blanket, two stuffed animals, 3 sweat pant sets, and a huge box of stickers. It was just too much.

Leaving late I still managed to get o my brother’s house for a quick lunch before heading to the airport.

Our wait for the gate in Vermont wasn’t too bad. The airport was very crowded though. Our flight to Detroit wasn’t too bad either and we even managed to secure an extra seat.

However, once we landed in Detroit, we got there late. And the jet bridge was broken. And we alteady had to hurry from C24 to B18 to make our connection. The delays didn’t help.

So we ran.

Only to leave an hour and a half late anyway because of some TSA security issue with the inbound flight.

When we finally left, the flight was booked solid, Celeste fell asleep and I could not get comfortable. For 2.5 hours I tossed and turned and increased the crick in my neck. Ouch.

I can’t wait to land. 12 more minutes. It’ll be good to be home.

After getting ourselves ready in the morning, C and I went for a hike up Mt. Philo in order to look over the entire Champlain valley. At least that was the goal. Access tithe park was closed, however. So, we could only access the trail that criscrosses up the side of the mountain. It was steep, and rocky, and covered in mud from the rain the day before. We made it about 1/2 a mike before I needed a break. I put C down on a rock to rest and that’s when she decided she wanted no more walking (which, for her, means being carried by me). So, after a quick rest we headed back down which was really difficult thanks to all the mud. We made it though. C fell asleep on the 10 minute drive home BEFORE 11am, so I think she needed he rest.

While she slept I had a really enjoyable conversation with a friend over IM while fixing my grandfather’s computer. More than anything I was grateful for a little privacy, the first that I’d had since I left home.

When C woke up we ate lunch and then piled in the car to head to my Aunt’s house. The drive over the mountain was beautiful. We stopped at the top and I made a snow ball for C to hold. We took a couple of photos too. It was so cool to see the thick, heavy snow fresh on the evergreens at the summit, followed by a band of gold and red and orange of the deciduous trees in the valley, followed by the grey and black outlines of the mountains of New York followed by the grey, white, and blue band of sky and clouds. I only hope the photo I captured with a toddler in my other arm manages to do it some justice.

My Aunt’s house was lots of fun. Good people, good food, good everything. I only wish I had more time there.

The drive home was a bit tense. The same curvy mountain back road that was so beautiful during the day becomes quite scary at night with no light. Thankfully there was almost no water on the roads which meant the drive was easy and I didn’t have any slips.

As soon as we got home we climbed in bed. I tried to get a good night’s sleep, but I didn’t do very well.

Today we head back to Texas. I miss you all so much. You should probably start the emails and phone calls now so I’ll feel good about myself and know that I’m going to see you all very soon.

After we get up, we’ll have breakfast and pack our bags. We’ll stop in the city to mail something via UPS. Then drive to my brother’s place about an hour north. There, C will get some running around done and hoefully tire herself a hit and get rid of some of the antsies. After lunch we’ll head back tithe city, return the rental car, take a shuttle to the airport, and be headed toward Texas via Detroit.

Weeeee!

(since I took the time to set it up, I decided I may as well test the new blog by email feature. So, this entry was sent via email.)

I’ve been up since 4am unable to sleep. On the plus side, I managed to get a lot done.

All of our clothes are packed. Except Socks, Underware, Shoes, and Belts.

I drank an entire pot of coffee.

I put a Wonderpets movie, 2 Wonderpets episodes, and 2 Backyardigans episodes on my iPod for C to watch. She doesn’t watch TV, so I’m just hoping the novelty will keep her entertained. $2/episode seems like a lot, but whatever.

I got a handle on arranging some of my music. This means my iPod now has better music than before and is filled closer to capacity.

I sorted out a few Facebook and website things in order to make updating while traveling easier. I don’t know why, but I love being able to do so, That being said, you should now see “Jim Reverend”, “Daniel James”, and “Amorphous” pages on Facebook. Fan them. Livejournal updates will not happen any more. I give up. And revjimweb on Twitter should have all of this, assuming everything is lined up right.

I still need to pack our plane bags, the above mentioned items, and all the random other stuff we’ll need: Laptop, cameras, batteries, sippy cups, blankets, toiletries, stuffed animals, books, etc. I figure I should be able to get to that with C awake. And she’ll be waking up any minute now.

The plan is to go to my dad’s at some point today, hang out there, sleep there, and then get to the airport tomorrow at 5:30am. I’m ready for the adventure. I really think C is going to enjoy it too. Hopefully, she’ll take my attitude toward travel which can be summed up like this: let things go as they go, you’ll get there when you get there, talk to people, watch people, and don’t be afraid to look stupid.

Kyro was a huge lifesaver to me this morning. I honestly don’t even know what he was doing awake or what state of inebriation he was in, but it really doesn’t matter. I was stressing out big time and helped bring me some clarity.

My biggest concern right now is that the kiddo might be sick. I really hope not. I took her temperature while she was asleep and it was 101. So, if she does have a fever, it probably isn’t much.

Enjoy this photo. It’s a picture of her at the park a few days ago.

Posted via email from revjim’s posterous

Celeste under monkey bars

It’s such a beautiful day out today.

I have a lot to do to get ready for our trip and a messy house to clean.

I should pick up C from school, take up both straight home, make a quick dinner, and get to the cleaning and packing.

But, at the same time, it seems really unfair to keep either of us couped up inside when the weather is so nice.

So… I think we’ll just enjoy the weather, eat out some place reasonable, and deal with the packing once the sun goes down.

The path of happiness is always the right path to take.

What do you do when the weather is so nice?